What is Intellectualizing? (Plus Why It Isn’t Always a Bad Thing)

I have been seeing a lot of internet conversation about intellectualizing from social media videos of people self-identifying and having intellectualizing tendencies to tips and tricks related to getting over intellectualizing. Ultimately, almost all of them present intellectualizing as a bad thing.

So, What is Intellectualizing?

Intellectualizing is one of the many defense mechanisms that your mind can engage when feeling or sensations feel overwhelming or unsafe to engage with. Intellectualizing involves using reason, analysis, and logic to address emotions instead of feeling them. What does this look like practically?

You were excited about plans with a friend and they cancel and you feel sad but instead of feeling and recognizing the sadness your mind produces a rush of analytical thoughts.

They had a good reason for canceling so why do I still feel sad?

This probably has to do with my issues around abandonment which is illogical here.

This person has been a good friend to me and is usually reliable so it is not like this is part of a pattern. There is no reason to feel sad when they obviously aren’t abandoning me.

Since I have no reason to be sad I should probably do something to reduce this sadness or help it to go away. I could think through my list of coping skills.

There are a few problems with intellectualizing.

• In all of the thinking sometimes we miss out on really important information or new things we could discover about ourselves if we didn’t rush to figuring out our emotions and instead felt them.

• Sometimes it can intensify distress because emotions that we resist can actually stick around for longer.

• We are acting on and continually building up a belief that our emotions are problems, bad, and need to be fixed when all emotions are part of the experience of being human.

• We can actually reduce our confidence in our ability to soothe and regulate and miss out on opportunities to soothe and regulate.

  The Benefits of Intellectualizing

  Intellectualizing does have it’s benefits thought. We are not always in a position to be ready to process or engage with emotions. When we are in crisis, in the middle of a very busy day where we need to be able to continue to function, or we don’t have the support or skills we need to process emotions or experiences then defense mechanisms are a great thing. They allow you to function and continuing growing until your do have the support, time, and space that you need.

How to Start Breaking Out of Intellectualizing

When I am working with clients who want to intellectualize less and feel more I always encourage them to start with resourcing. Resourcing is learning how to connect with wellbeing by thinking about or engaging with memories, activities, favorite places, or moments. Resourcing can be done through visualization, looking at photos, or even just thinking about things that connect you with wellbeing. The power of resourcing come from engaging with the resource and then noticing where you can sense wellbeing, regulation, or relaxation in the body. The more that you resource the more confidence you can have that you can make space for a wide range of emotions in a way that is emotionally safe.