An Open Letter to Black Women Who Are Transforming Trauma
Hey Sis,
First I want to say I see you. I see how beautiful and scary, lonely and liberated, connected and conflicted this journey has been for you. Your healing is a moment-by-moment choice, a decision you have to make over and over again.
From the time that you wake up have to make the choice between springing into action getting things done, losing yourself deep in your phone, or taking a second for yourself to recognize your humanity and embrace gratitude for a day to the time you choose between honoring your bodies need for sleep at night, taking another half hour to get that chore done, or working with a mind that wants to use this time to be awake and process… all of it is healing work.
It doesn’t all look and feel like meditation, lighting candles, saying your affirmations, bubble baths, and yoga classes (even though all those things can be important and helpful).
You are healing when you wash your dishes and tidy your space because you know a uncluttered home helps you clear your mind. You are also healing when you delegate some of those responsibilities to someone else.
You are healing when you hair isn’t cooperating and you breathe out “It is what it is” with acceptance. You are healing when you decide to run 10 minutes late because you know having your hair right is just want you need today.
You are healing when you recognize you’re lonely and text a friend to spend some good time together. You are healing when you stay home because you are tired or in a season of detaching from some relationships that no longer serve you.
You are healing when you treat your kids gently, play with them, and cuddle them. You are healing when they frustrate you and you catch yourself about to go off and go in your room and cuss out the wall instead.
You are healing on your therapist’s couch, your couch, your cousin’s couch, your sisters house and your open yourself to vulnerability, connection, and exploration.
All of it is healing, choice by choice, and the beautiful thing is all your choices don’t need to line up with healing to be powerful. You are on an upward current, it is uneven, and wobbly and it is heading up and beyond the things you’ve experienced before.
